Fallen Angel
by Pohjola
Summary: MALEC AU. What if Alec did not stand a chance against his own fate after the break-up? What will Magnus do? And how will everyone else react?
1. Chapter 1

Magnus was staring at his reflection on the glass, the book abandonend on the windowsill, his cat eyes shining in the dim lit library of the Institute.

_I don't want to see you again, Alec. Or any of your friends. I'm tired of being their pet warlock._

The words he had said to Alec just a pair of week earlier kept echoing in his mind, too bad he hadn't been able to keep his promise, the war was coming there was no room for personal problems.

He let his breath out and leaned his forehead on the cold glass. Actually the one person he had not seen since that day in the subway was Alec himself.

He would have never admitted it, but everytime he entered the Institute he hoped for Alec to come and smile at him, that smile Magnus loved. Yet he knew somewhere deep inside his heart that his blue eyed Nephilim would stay away from him just as he had asked him to.

He had been the one saying their relationship was over and even if he missed Alec more than anything in the world he still felt hurt by his behaviour.

Alec was wandering alone. He could not stand staying at the Institute doing nothing save for training. He had never been like Jace who was able to fight stress or pain by fighting, he needed silence.

He had spent the first days after Magnus had broken up with him staring at the ceiling, utterly unable to sleep, then little by little he had started to feel nothing but numbness.

The light of Manhattan shone across the river, the wind caressed the Shadowhunter's black hair.

Suddenly a football player-looking boy bumped into him.

Had not been for the shiver down his spine, Alec would have thought the guy was just drunk, instead he took his Seraph Blade and had just the time to whisper its name, before the guy hit his side with a knife.

Everything went on in complete silence, the Shadowhunter and the demon fighting in the middle of the deserted road.

The demon bit the side of Alec's neck and the Nephilim jabbed his blade inside the chest of his enemy. The guy screamed and disappeared.

The pain left Alec almost blind, he fell down hitting the ground hard, the seraph blade still in his hand and a single thought in his mind

"I'm dying, everything's over."

Minutes passed by long as hour, it started to rain, the cold drops on his pale face looked like tears, even if he had no strenght to cry, what he desired the most was being able to look to Magnus face just one last time.

-Alec, Alec what happened?-

The voice came to him as from a very long distance, and it was just when he succeded in opening his eyed that he realized it was Simon who had spoken and that he was leaning over him.

-S... Simon...- He breathed. -Demon bite.-

-I'll take you to the Institute.- Simon tried to lift Alec, but the Nephilim shook his head.

-There's no time.- Simon's eyes looked oddly big on his face.

-I can run fast. I'll bring you at Magnus's he will cure you.-

-No!- Alec had meant to shout, but all that came out of his throat was a rattle.

-I won't let you die.- Alec's lips curled into a slight grateful smile.

-You can help, you can Turn me.-

Simon was sure that, if Alec had not been so pale and weak from the fight, would have flushed, and suddenly he realized what the Nephilim had said, the deep true meaning of his words.

-You're kidding me!- It was clear Alec was not kidding, he looked deadly pale and it was plain he was getting worse and worse. -Magnus will heal you.-

-Magnus will die in the process, Simon.- Red blood started to come out from Alec's lips, yet his eyes flashed of fear and pain.

Simon, despite his nature, felt cold, Alec was determined to die or being Turned and as he had swore he would never let him die.

-Ok, I'll do it if you want me to.-

-Yes, I beg you.-

Simon nodded and reached for Alec's neck. His blood didn't taste like Jace's, it was sweet and rich in a different way, it tasted like Alec himself, strong and frail at the same time.

Without realizing it he was hugging him as he would hug his own brother.

When the blue in Alec's eyes looked like glass, Simon made him drink his own blood.

-Thank you...- Alec whispered and tried to smile before his eye lids became too heavy and he closed his eyes. His breath stopped and he stood still into Simon's arms.

He wished he could cry the death of the boy who had become so dear to him as a member of his own family but there was no time indeed, he needed to bury him e let him rise again as a vampire. Simon lift Alec's body and ran. Where could he bury him? Alec was not a christian nor a jewish he was a Shadowhunter and Shadowhunters were to be buried in the Bones City, but the Silent Brothers would not allow a newborn vampire to raise in that sacred place.

He looked down at Alec's face, he had never looked so serene as now, in the eternal sleep of death, and suddenly the answer came to Simon's mind. Alec had asked him to be Turned just in order to protect Magnus, Magnus who would have died in the process of saving his mortal life, to Alec Magnus was the most precious thing in the world.

When the buzzer rang Magnus startled.

It was not like he was actually waiting for someone and he was not in the mood for wandering Shadowhunters asking for his help.

He opened the door and wait, his cat eyes glowing in the dark staircase.

The first thing he saw was Simon's face, his painful expression and the blood on his lips. He was about to tell the vampire he had no time for whatever he wanted, but then when he looked down he saw the only thing in the world he could have never been ready to see: Alec, the love of his life, dead.

Magnus ran to Simon ready to smash him down, instead he took the Shaodowhunter's body from him calling his name, hugging and rocking it and the tears started running through his face.

-You have to help him, Magnus.- Simon whispered, but the Warlock looked too shellshocked to hear anything.

-Magnus listen to me.- Simon tried again and this time the green gold eyes of the Warlock looked straight at him.

-You killed him, I'll kill you.- He said. Simon shook his head and forced himself to stay still even though blue sparks had began to spill from Magnus's fingers.

-Stop it Magnus, we need to bury Alec and wait for the twilight, trust me please.-

The look on Magnus's face went from painful to horrified.

-You made him one of your kind, my precious Alec, my Angel you Turned him into a Demon, you're the worst...-

-He asked me to.- Simon's breathed. Magnus's body was shaking.

-That's my fault.- He whispered. Simon took his hand.

-No, it's not. Alec was dying a demon bit him, I found him and told Iwould have brought him to you to make you cure him, but he refused, he said you would have died in the process, and then he said the only thing I could do to preserve him from dying was Turning him.- Magnus's face was paler than ever.

-He wanted to protect you Magnus, he wanted you to be safe.-

The warlock lift Alec's body as it was the most important thing in the world and muttered something that Simon considered as an order to move. Together they reached for the backyard and Magnus sat on the ground with his loved one into his arms.

-Prepare the grave Vampire.- He said bitterly and a spade appeared beside Simon. In the meantime Magnus was caressing Alec's hair.

Before putting Alec's body into his grave, Magnus kissed his lips and said something in a language Simon did not know.

They covered the grave and then sat down waiting.

Magnus's expression was blank as the pain had dried every other feeling from him.

-Alec loves you, Magnus.- Simon whispered forcing himself to ignore the silence between them. The warlock did not answer.

-Magnus, please say something.-

-Why? What do you expect me to say? That it's all right, Alec'll wake up and everything will be fine, well Simon it's not like that, he died, he died and I was not there to protect him, in fact I was the reason why he was alone.- He stopped and he looked like he ran off of breath. -I put the one person I love more than my own life in danger and let him die and throw away everything in what he believed.-

Simon looked away from the warlock and took an useless breath.

- If it had been you who were dying and knowing that Alec could have helped you at the cost of his life what would have you done?- He whispered.

-I'd rather be dead than being alive knowing I've been the reason for Alec's death, which is exactly what happened in the end, I'm alive, Alec died in the process of saving me.-

-He didn't, he has been strong enough to chose a different path. The only one which would allow you both to stay alive.-

When the twilight arrived, Magnus felt like he had no more tears to cry, it has been centuries since the last time he had actually cried.

The sun went down disappearing behind the Hudson and the Warlock's cat eyes looked at the mole-hill under which Alec's body was buried. He had seen many vampires raise, the inhuman look in their eyes, their lust for blood, he didn't want to see his Alec like that, but he knew he had to be strong as his blue eyed angel had been when he had chosen that life. Magnus moved foreward and as he did so he saw something glimmering. As a pulse the white light similar to a witchlight became stronger and stronger.

With a scream Magnus catch the cold hand coming out from under the ground, Alec's hand, he took it and wait for the other one to reach out.

When Clary had helped Simon out of his grave, Magnus had not fully realize how she felt, but now he felt like his whole life depended on that moment.

When Alec raised he had his eyes shut, his lips parted, but his skin was white, smooth as porcelain, no dirt had affected it nor the black hair around his pretty face.

Magnus didn't let go of his hands, he muttered his name and waited for him to attack in search for blood. Alec opened his eyes and stared at the warlock calmly, then smiled.

-I hoped I just could see you the moment I'd wake up.- He whispered. His eyes were a bright crystal blue, brighter then ever and his voice was sweet, the voice Magnus had recalled in his dreams.

-Sweetheart...- He called in a whisper and reached his face with his fingers, brushing his cheek lightly. It was not as cold as Magnus had expected.

-I'm sorry for everything.- Alec said. He looked like he was about to cry. Magnus just shook his head unable to say anything.

-Don't you need blood?- Simon's voice came as from a very far place.

-Maybe.- Alec muttered.

-How can that be? You're supposed to be thirsty.-

-I know. It's just I'm not.-

-Simon go inside, we will be there right away.- Simon looked at Magnus and nodded and moved, suddenly aware that they needed their own time together.

-Do you feel cold?- Magnus asked as soon as Simon disappeared inside the apartment.

Alec shook his head and then looked up at the warlock's face.

-I feel strong and still broken inside as I was when I realized what I'd done to you.-

-I love you Alec, this hasn't changed...-

-But you won't be with me again, I know that much.- He looked down before Magnus's fingers lifted his face and his lips touched Alec's for an eternal moment.

-I love you and I want you, I can't live without you by my side.- Magnus breathed.

Alec smiled lightly and put his head on Magnus's shoulder.

The warlock lifted him into his arms.

-Let's go home.- He said kissing his black hair.


	2. Chapter 2

-ALEC!-

Jace woke up in the middle of the night screaming and shaking, his hair plastered on the back of his neck.

Brother Zacariah moved at his side trying to put a reassuring hand on his shoulder but the moment he did so he felt the sting of burning in his fingers and was forced to let go. The Shadowhunter's hands were glowing more brightly than usual and the Silent Brother knew that that was not a good sign. The Heavenly Fire was barely in control.

Jace did not realize any of that, he kept staring at the wall in front of him suddenly aware of the sorroundings and recognizing the Infirmary. He did not seem to find the realizion anything near reassuring.

-I have to find him, I have to go.- He moved frantly to put the sheets away.

"Who are you talking about?" The words resounded in Jace's head.

Brother Zacariah was standing beside the bed, the aching fingers still clutched into a fist. The boy looked at him as he hadn't noticed the Silent Brother was there until that moment. Even though Jace knew all too well that he spent every night watching over him.

"You seem worried, what did you see in your dream?"

Jace shook his head and got out of the bed.

-Alec, I have to find him.- He started collecting his clothes and putting them on. Brother Zacariah did not make a move, he seemed to be waiting for the Jace to tell him everything, and Jace did not want to waste any time.

-I saw him, he was smiling and he asked me to forgive him, when I told him there was nothing I had to forgive, he shrugged and said "Goodbye". I called him, but he turned and went away and on his shoulders there were wings, silver wings. I don't know what it means, but Alec is my _parabatai_ and I need to find him, to know he is ok.-

The fist Brother Zacariah had his hand clutched into tightened, it was impossible to say, but he seemed upset.

"Do you feel anything?"

Jace stopped moving altogether and closed his eyes focusing on his parabatai rune and on Alec. He gasped.

-I don't understand.- He bit his bottom lip -I can sense him, but not the way I could before. I feel his presence, but it's different, it's like Alec is under the water and I cannot reach him. I need to find him.-

Jace ran to the door, but Brother Zacariah was faster and grasped his wrist, careless of the pain that spread to his palm.

"Do you have anything to track him?"

Jace's eyes widened in disbelief.

-Will you help me?-

"I know what it feels like to care for another person the way you care for Alexander."

Jace took the book Alec had left in his room that afternoon and tore a little piece of paper, he used the simple tracking spell he had once used for Sebastian.

At first he saw nothing but darkness, then slowly pieces of pictures came to his mind: a small garden, the familiar door. He could not say whether they were slice of the present or memories, but he recognized the place.

-He is at Magnus'!-

Brother Zacariah nodded once and then motioned for him to go.

"I will follow you."

Let the Silent Brothers to know how they could move through the city, but when Jace reached Magnus' home, Brother Zacariah was already there waiting for him.

The buzzer rang twice.

Magnus swore under his breath, Simon looked at him waiting for an answer to his unspoken question. They were both in the living room at the moment, Magnus' kept running hands in his hair – and it was starting becoming really unnerving - as he restlessly turned the pages from the five books he had in front of him. Simon kept serving him cup after cup of black coffee.

The buzzer rang for the third time.

-Open that damn door!- The warlock snapped at the vampire. -And kill them, whoever they are!-

Simon tried to take a breath in an attempt to calm his nerves, it seemed to work despite the obvious fact that he did not need to breath.

He had never seen Magnus like that, he seemed scared to the point of being freaking out, at least the Warlock had not tried to kill him again, Simon decided that should be a good sign.

By the time he opened the door someone was already running up the stairs and he could smell the scent of Jace. Simon waited for him on top of the stairscase and his eyes opened wide when he saw Brother Zacariah following the Shadowhunter. Jace was supposed not to leave the Institute so something should have happenened, but Simon felt himself unable to think about it, knowing he had killed one of his friends and Turned him was enough of a bargain to bear.

-Simon what the hell are you doing...-

-That's not the best moment to come here, Jace.- Simon cut him off.

The blond boy stared at him in disbelief.

-What do you mean, not the best moment? I need to speak to Magnus, it's...-

-Jace trust me. This is not the right moment, go away and come back later, please.-

-Let me in!- Jace stubbornly insisted.

Simon did not move, he just shook his head.

Magnus appeared in the frame of the door, his cat-like eyes still marked from unshed tears and his face grave with a deep sadness. He was bare-footed and there was no trace of glitter on his body.

-Leave Shadowhunter, now.- He said in a low harsh voice which Jace did not recognize as Magnus'.

-I won't until you tell me where Alec is.-

Magnus' eyes widened and the boy ifinally realized that he was shaking.

Jace was about to break in but Brother Zacariah moved a step foreward revealing his presence to Magnus.

The Warlock shook his head looking at the Silent Brother.

"Can you tell us what happened? Please Magnus"

For the first time that night Magnus looked defeated.

-Come in.- He whispered painfully and moved to the living room.

Simon closed the door and was the last to follow.

Magnus snapped his fingers and a couple of armachairs appeared out of nowhere.

Brother Zacariah took the hint and sat down, had he not been so worried, Jace would have found the idea of the Silent Brother sat on the blue armachair in the colorful room very funny.

Magnus paced around taking the books from the floor and from the sofa in order to put them on the coffee table.

-Stop fussing around, tell me, is Alec ok? Where is he? Magnus.- Jace's voice sounded groggy even to himself.

-I'm here.- Someone spoke calmly from behind Jace, Magnus stopped moving while Jace and Brother Zacariah turned.

Alec was standing against the kitchen counter wearing just a pair of blue jeans, his eyes seemed too big on his pale face. Nobody had heard him coming.

At first Jace felt just relief, Alec was alive and all right, it was only when he felt an uncomfortable sound in his head, probably from Brother Zacariah, that the Shadowhunter realized what his eyes had refused to see: the Marks on Alec's porcelain skin were not black as they were suppose to be, they were silver except for the parabatai rune near his collarbone, that one was a bright red which made Jace think of blood.

Magnus ran to Alec and clutched him in his arms in a clear attempt of shielding the black-haired boy from something.

Alec lightly brushed his tan cheek and smiled, but didn't move away from the Warlock.

-Don't worry. Apparentely I can stand the sun.-

Magnus nodded but didn't let go. Alec put his head on Magnus' shoulder and looked sideway at his _parabatai_.

Jace had his lips slightly parted and was clearly confused.

-What happened?- He managed to ask a little too curtly, but Alec didn't seem to mind, he just shrugged and smiled sadly.

-I was reckless and a demon bit me.-

Brother Zacariah seemed to hunch his shoulders as he was in pain and Simon moved a step closer to him.

-Is that why your Marks are silver?- Jace asked.

Alec shook his head.

-Magnus is still trying to find an answer to that.-

-But are you all right now, did Magnus heal your wounds?-

Magnus stiffened in his lover's embrace. Alec heard his heartbeat quickening and took his hand in an attempt to calm him.

-There was no need for him to heal any wound when I arrived here, but he stayed by my side all the time.- He said looking straight in the Warlock's cat-like eyes.

Simon was beating his lower lip. He was grateful Alec hadn't told the part of the story where he had Turned him yet, but surely he would be forced to tell everything and Simon was not anxious to see Jace's reaction.

-Alec I don't understand.- Jace said looking hopelessly at his own hand. -I felt something was wrong, like you were too far away from me.-

Alec smiled again, this time his smile was just sad, and it was then that Jace saw how his little incisors were sharper than usual.

This time he felt no relief, just fear. Brother Zacariah stood next to the Shadowhunter.

"In his dream, Jace saw Alexander with silver wings." Though the Brother's voice echoed in everyone's mind, it seemed clear that he was talking to Magnus who lowered his head.

-That's what I feared.- He whispered.

-What?- Jace asked. Magnus held Alec tight in his arms and kissed his hair with so much love and devotion that Brother Zacariah knew he would regret the words he had to say for the rest of his life.

"Alexander is a Nephilim no more, he is one of the Fallen now."


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Note: **Someone told me that this story can be a little confusing because "Alec was not an angel to begin with". Well he is a Nephilim, Nephilim are mortal descendats of angels, which means that he has angel blood in his veins, not as much as Jace, but still he has it. The fact that he turns into a Fallen is obviously my idea and I did not mean the term "Fallen" as you can mean it when it is referred to Lucifer.  
Let's just say that I conceived this group of Nephilim which chose the "evil path".  
This is one of the reason why this is an AU.

Someone else wrote that Alec would never ask for being Turned in order to be immortal, that is unmistakable true, but what in this story he did not asked of being turned to be immortal, he was ready to die when Simon found him. He asked Simon to Turn him because he knew that otherwise they would have brought him to Magnus (or Magnus to him) and Magnus would have died to save him no matter what. Besides if Alec had died Isabelle would have been in pain once again she would have lost another brother.

By the way thank you for the reviews I really appreciated them, and of course I don't own any of the characters.

Just for a moment Alec thought he was about to gasp, than he remembered he was no longer a breathing creature and together with that realization came the awareness that he didn't care what he was, he had made a choice and would stick to it no matter what.

-What does it mean he is one of the Fallen?- Jace asked still staring at his brother.

-The Fallen are damned Nephilim, or this is the way Nephilim describe them. Did you never pay any attention during classes?- Alec answered without moving away from Magnus who seemed too shocked to react.

-I know who they are, but you were bit by a demon and ended up on of the Fallen, that doesn't make any sense, Alec!-

"It would be better if we all sit, don't you think Magnus?"

The warlock nodded and kept and arm around Alec shoulders while they moved to the sofa.

"Alexander would you please tell us the whole story?" Brother Zacariah asked politely.

Alec sat between Magnus' legs, the warlock hugged him from behind and his chest leaned against Alec's back. The two men had their fingers entwined.

-As I said I was reckless, I went out hunting alone and the demon I was fighting bit me. I was bleeding to death in an alley when Simon found me.- Simon made an uncomfortable noise, but did not interrupt. -He told me he would bring me to the Institute, when I explained there was not enough time for that he insisted into bring me to Magnus and let him heal me and I refused.- Jace's eyes were wide with disbelief.

-You did what?-

"Jace!" Brother Zacariah's voice broke up into their mind and Jace went silent.

-I refused. If Simon had brought me to Magnus, he would have healed me and he would have died in the process, I was aware of the seriousness of my wounds.- Alec's voice raised just a little and in his eyes flashed with a spark of silver.

-I asked Simon to Turn me, that was the only way for me to survive. He tried to make me change my mind, but I did not so he was forced to Turn me or let me die, and he swore he would never let me die. When I woke up, I was in Magnus garden, I was not thirsty and when we came up here, we found out my Marks apparead like this.-

The Warlock kissed Alec's hair tenderly. No one was talking, the silence seemed heavy and concrete, until Jace stood up in one movement

-You ask a vampire to turn you? What the hell were you thinking Alec?-

Alec's blue eyes widened in disbelief at his parabatai's angry words, but this time he didn't feel ashamed of anything, he felt... angry, angrier than he had ever felt before

A strange sound came from his throat, it seemed a hiss but his voice came out as soft cold whisper.

-What were YOU thinking when you ran away to find Sebastian by yourself back in Idris, what were you thinking when you hid the fact that you have died to all of us, what were you thinking when you didn't tell us about your nightmares? What were you thinking back then Jace? I guess you were not thinking at all, you were just going on your way and never once thought that your problems would turn into our problems eventually, because that's the way you are: a reckless pretentious fool.- Alec was standing by the time he had finished his speech, his eyes shone silver, any track of blue completely gone from them.

Jace had moved a step away from him, he had never heard his parabatai talking like that.

-I'm sorry.- He whispered awkardly.

Alec smiled before feeling his strenghth leaving him altogheter and collapsed.

-Alexander!- Magnus screamed taking him into his arms and rocking him back and forth saying his name.

-Conjure some blood he needs it, now.- Simon who had been silent till then finally spoke, and Brother Zachariah put a long pale hand on the black hared shadowhunter's forehead.

"He is exhauted, he needs some energy. The Daylighter is right."

-I'll give him mine!- Jace had his sleave already put back, but Brother Zacariah stopped him, Jace would have never thought that a Silent Brother could have such a strong grip.

"Heavenly Fire is running through your veins, you would destroy Alexander if he drank your blood."

Jace face went completely blank as he stared at his best friend face.

Magnus snap his fingers and a little dagger appeared out of nowher in his hands and without a word the Warlock cut his own wrist.

-Drink, my love, my Alec.- he whispered. The blood tainted Alec's lips and rapidily slipped down. Little by little the boy started to drink but he stopped when his eyes flew open and he realized he was drinking Magnus' blood. He seemed to choke but suddenly grasped the wrist the Warlock was keeping near his mouth and drank greedly never leaving his lover's eyes.

It took no more than a few minuts for Alec to move away from the blood and kissing Magnus' wounded wrist, immediately the flash appeared healed and the Warlock exaustion seemed to disappear.

-What did you do to me?- He asked softly.

-I shared my strenght with you, Iguess.- Alec bent his head down shyly.

Jace was about to speak again when Simon gave him a fiery glance and moved towards the blond Shadowhunter.

-I know you hate me, but you've to understand that Alec would have gone for good if I hadn't accepted to Turn him.-

Jace felt an annoying limp in his throat and found himself unable to speak, he just nodded and looked at Alec again.

Magnus had his arms wrapped around Alec's body and his face hidden in his black hair, and Alec was smiling at the Warlock a whispering soothing words Jace couldn't hear.

-Should we go back to the Institute?- He asked Brother Zacariah.

"If you think that this is the best thing for you to do, yes we can go back."

Alec turned his head to face his parabatai.

-Jace.- He called softly. -Tell Izzy I am all right, please.-

The Shadowhunter nodded quietly.

"Magnus you can always call me." Brother Zacariah told them and followed Jace out.

-How do you feel?- Magnus asked clearly worried keeping an arm around his boyfriend shoulders.

-Fine given all the dead and reborn matter.- He smiled.

Simon absent mindly took the last empty cup from the coffee table and moved to put it away when he felt someone touching his arm lightly, when he turn around he saw Alec, his head cocked on one side and a thoughtful expression on his face.

-Izzy will be grateful you Turned me, she could have never survived to another brother's death, you saved her too.- He smiled a little.

Simon stared at Alec's blue eyes just for a second.

-Thank you.- He whispered.


	4. Chapter 4

Isabelle Lightwood was pacing restlessly in the kitchen at the Institute.

She moved from the fridge to the table, checking her phone, and back again. Finally she picked up the phone and moved to the dim lit hall. She sat on the stairs, eyes fixed on the door.

-Izzy what are you doing here?- Clary's voice made her turn and glare at the redhead.

-Do you know where Jace is?- She asked abruptly and looked as the girl turned paler and paler.

-Is he not in the Infirmary with Brother Zacariah?-

-No, they're both gone.-

-Maybe Alec knows.- Clary said hopeful, but Izzy shook her head.

-Alec's not in his room.- In her dark eyes flashed a shadow, was it worry or … fear?

Clary went sitting beside the dark haired girl, nervously biting her lower lip.

-Maybe they are together, don't you think?-

Izzy shook her head once again.

-I'm sure that when Alec went out Jace was still in the Infirmary, and I haven't heard Alec coming back since then.-

Izzy started patting her foot on the floor nervously and Clary was sure the other girl was about to storm out of the Institute looking for her brothers, when the door finally burst open and Jace ran insiade followed by the Silent Brother.

He didn't notice his sister and girlfriend sitting there, his hand rested on his shoulder caressing lightly the point where is Parabatai rune was and he seemed in pain.

-What the hell happened?- Izzy hissed making Jace jump in surprise. -Where have you been?-

Jace slowly turned to face the girls, who were now standing a few feet from him and Brother Zacariah, and showed his skin glowing dangerously.

His eyes were big in his face and he looked feverish.

Clary ran to him, but Jace jerked backward.

-Don't, not now.- He panted.

She looked at Brother Zacariah.

"Jace will be ok, don't worry." His voice echoed in their heads.

It was then that they noticed Izzy staring at the hand Jace kept against his collarbone. There was blood on his skin, and his shirt was soaked.

-No... please... no...- She was whispering and then she seemed about collapsing. -Please not Alec.-

She plead moving her arms around her waist as if she was breaking down in pieces.

Clary moved to support her and Izzy leaned over the shorter girl, she was shaking.

Jace moved the hand away looking in disbelief at the blood on his fingers.

Brother Zacariah moved closer to Jace and quickly examined his skin without touching it: the rune was still there, but it was crimson red instead of black.

"Alexander is alive." He told them.

Izzy fell on the floor like a puppet without strings and Clary collapsed beside her hurting her knees, but didn't say anything.

-Where is he? Where is my brother?- Izzy's voice sounded so broken that it hardly sound like hers.

-He's with...- The ring of Izzy's phone cut Jace off.

Clary took it from the other girl's shaking hand and opened the message.

-It's Simon, he says that Alec is fine, but he need to talk to you and he is outside.-

Isabelle stood up and ran outside, Jace had no time to stop her. Clary ducked her head and stared at his boyfriend asking silently to know what had happened. Brother Zacariah moved soundlessly to the Infirmary.

Magnus laid awake, his fingers moving slowly through Alec's hair. He knew Alec wasn't asleep either, even though he couldn't hear his breath. Alec didn't need to breath anymore, Magnus thought painfully.

The Warlock held him tighter feeling his lips pressing on the side of his own neck.

-Promise me you won't ever leave.- Magnus whispered.

Alec caressed the side of his face and smiled a little.

-I won't, if that's what you really want.-

Magnus took Alec's chin between his fingers to make him look straight in his eyes.

-Do you doubt me wanting you forever?-

Alec shook his head slightly, his blue eyes were so vulnerable that Magnus wished he could erease every pain from his soul, he wanted to see Alec's smile.

-It's just... It's just that I know I will always need to know you, everything about you, and I will always feel like you are shutting me out every time you refuse to tell me something about you.- By the end of his speech he was looking down at his hands.

-Look at me.- Magnus asked and Alec did so. -I have been alive so long that some things of my past are like old dreams, I cannot even remember whether they are true or not. Others are strong and painful. I was scared of telling you, scared of letting you in, because my heart has been broken so many times...- Alec moved so fast that Magnus had no time to react, even though he would have never moved away from him, and they were kissing.

-I missed this.- Magnus said softly.

-I missed you.- His boyfriend smiled and put his hand on Magnus' chest, right upon his heart. -I won't break it. It's too important to me, just like you.-

Isabelle found herself sitting on the stairs, again. The air of the night was cool, even though not cold, but she was shaking slightly.

Simon was standing in front of her with his eyes hidden behind his too long hair. Telling her what had happened had been one of the hardest thing he had ever done in his.

When he heard her heels on the marble slowly moved his head to look at her. Isabelle's dark eyes were rimmed with red, her face was wet, she had cried.

-I want my brother, I want to see him.- She said under her breath.

Simon seemed shocked.

-He... he is at Magnus'... I...I don't...-

-Will you come with me, or should I go by myself?- Isabelle cut his stammering off. Simon shook his head.

-I'll go with you.-

Isabelle started walking in the direction of Magnu's apartment, all too aware of the girl at his side who was not looking at him.

He had known that Isabelle would be shocked, but the idea of being the reason why she seemed so shattered made him felt sick.

More he kept repeating Alec's words in his head more he felt he had been wrong, he hadn't saved Isabelle, he had just hurt her.

They walked in silence and they did not talk while they were on the underground, they did not exchange a word until they reached Magnus' loft.

-Is he still my brother, isn't he?- Isabelle seemed so scared, but that did not take Simon by surprise, after everything that had happened with Jace. He nodded.

-He asked me to tell you he was alright, that sound like Alec, doesn't it?-

She nodded absent mindly and rang the buzzer.

Magnus' sleepy voice answered, Isabelle just told him to let her in. Simon watched her enter and brace himself for the waiting.

Brother Zacariah was looking outside one of the window of the infirmary, while Jace and Clary were sitting on the bed.

Jace had not allowed her to touch him yet, so she was just waiting for him to speak.

-Alec was hurt during a fight.- He finally whispered. -He was hurt and I wasn't with him.-

Clary sighed silently.

-Don't try to tell me it wasn't my fault, Alec is a good fighter I know, but I should have seen how broken he was, even though he played strong around us, I should have known that he was suffering for Magnus. When he realized he was dying he asked Simon to Turn him, he refused to be taken to Magnus, he said Magnus would have died in the process of saving him and he couldnt't let him.-

Jace hid his face in his hands so he did not see Clary's eyes widen nor her hands on her mouth to stop her shaking breath.

-Alec is no more a Shadowhunter, he is something else.-

-A vampire?- Clary forced herself asking. Jace shook his head.

-No... He is one of the Fallen, and I don't even know what it means, because all I cared was fight and I always let the books and the studies to him, all I know is that when I told him he had been a fool, that he shouldn't have gave his life away, he snapped at me and called me a pretentious fool who never consider how his problems turn to be others' problem because he never thinks.-

-I am sure he didn't really think what he said, I guess he was just upset.-

Jace shook his head still without raise his head.

-He thought every single word, and he was right too, it's just that he never told me before, he is my...- He suddenly seemed to be chocking -He was my Parabatai.- He whispered staring at nothing in particular his eyes wide and unfocused.

"He is your parabatai Jace." Brother Zacariah voice said. "He chose not to leave your side, otherwise the rune would be gone by now."

Jace touched the parabatai rune on his skin and turned to look at the silent brother.

-How do you know he chose that?-

"I saw it in Alexander's eyes, he gave up his mortal life, but he never gave up his soul."

Clary looked from Jace to Brother Zacariah for a moment before asking

-Have you ever met others like Alec, the Fallen?-

"I have." He replied. "But they were not like Alexander, those were people who had been corrupted, greedy men who despised human life and longed for power and immortality. They sold their souls and turned into empty shells condemned to feed on blood and hatred until the darkness would consume them."

-Alec... he...- Jace looked horrified. Brother Zacariah moved to his side.

"His soul is one of the purest I have ever seen. He sacrificed something for the people he loves, there is nothing wrong in this."

Isabelle was sure she had never seen Magnus looking so awful as he looked while he was waiting for her leaning agaisnt the door-frame.

Even though he wore no make-up and no glitter, what really scared the young Shadowhunter were his eyes, it seemed he had been crying for hours and Isabelle felt her heart skip a beat while she ran.

When she was just in front of him she realized the Warlock was also deadly pale.

She fought the urge of snapping at him to move away and let her in, Magnus gave her a little apologizing sad smile, but Izzy didn't see it because her eyes caught the glimpse of black hair and pale skin. Magnus moved aside and she ran inside flying in her brother's strong arms.

Alec wrapped his arms around her slim frame and held her tight, Magnus shut the door and met his boyfriend's gaze.

They stayed like that for a while, the only sound was Isabelle's voice repeating Alec's name on and on.

-Shh Izzy it's all right, I am here, I won't leave.- Alec whispered in her sister's ear, but she just held on to him stronger.

-Simon told me what happened...- She sighed. -Jace's rune was bleeding I thought you were gone even though Brother Zacariah told us you were alive, and when Simon told me everything... I just needed to see you.-

Magnus came back with three cups of coffee and put the tray on the coffee table, Alec gratefully smilet at him.

-Come on little sister.- He whispered kissing Izzy's hair, and took her to the sofa.

Isabelle refused to leave her brother's side to the point that she forced him to put an arm around her shoulders, something, Alec knew, she would never allowed in any other circumstance.


	5. Chapter 5

**Thank you so much to everyone who has added this story to their favourites and/or to the follow-list. Also reviews are always welcome.**

**CHAPTER FIVE**

Magnus was looking at his boyfriend as Alec listened to his sister. Isabelle was a mess, her eyes were puffy from crying and her hair fell on her shoulders in knots, Alec on the other hand looked somehow at ease, there was a determination in his eyes that was not there before, when he was... alive. Magnus felt instantly sick at the thought, Alec was alive, completely alive, the fact that his heart did not beat anymore did not mean he was less alive, his hands started shaking and the Warlock put the mug down with too much strenght, so it broke and the coffee spilled on the the table.

-Magnus!- Alec's voice called out full of concern. The boy reached for his partner and took his shaking hands in one of his.

-It's nothing I... I will clean it up...It's ok.- He stuttered avoiding those blue eyes which he loved so much.

Alec sighed out of habit moving some black strands backwards and cupping Magnus' face in his free hand. He was kneeling on the floor next to the sofa where the Warlock was sitting.

-Talk to me, I cannot see you like that, not again.- He whispered shooking his head sadly.

Magnus glanced toward Isabelle who was staring at the porcelain shards, and Alec followed his gaze.

-I think I should go, Simon is downstairs... I guess.- Isabelle said uncertain.

-You left Simon downstairs?- Alec's eyes widened as his sister nodded and did not stand up.

-I will call Simon and tell him to go home. As for you Iz you can stay here for tonight, can't she Magnus?- The Warlock nodded silently.

Isabelle smiled thankfully and moved to the guest room.

-As for us, you definitely need to talk and stop looking so worried.- Alec said before kissing Magnus' lips lightly.

They moved to the bedroom, fingers entwined and just as the door was shut Magnus wrapped his arms around Alec and buried his face in the crock of his neck.

They stayed like that, Alec caressing Magnus' hair and back and the Warlock crying.

-It's all my fault, I know it is.- He finally managed to say.

Alec moved back a little and put his hands at both sides of Magnus' face to make him look strainght in his eyes.

-Now you listen to me.- He said calmer than he felt and motioned to himself before putting his hand back on his boyfriend's cheek. -This, all of this, is not your fault. This was my choice, mine and mine alone and I don't regret anything. My siblings will accept it, they will realize this was the only way to be with them, and I want you too to realize that I am here, I am so grateful that we are here, together and all I want is to see that wonderful smile of yours, no more tears.-

-Oh my Alec, I still can see your dead body and feel the pain and...- Alec's fingers caressed his hair.

-Hush hush, I was never dead, I was just asleep waiting for you, and you are here. That's all that counts.-

Magnus nodded and took Alec's closer to him once again, just whispering his name and begging him to stay.

-I won't go anywhere without you, you sparkly magnificent love of mine.- Alec smiled.

Magnus lift his head and looked at Alec's face, he was not crying anymore.

-Are you really happy?-

-I've never been happier.- He pecked Magnus on the lips. -Now let's go back to bed.-

It was barely breaking dawn when Jace realized he had not gotten any sleep.

Clary had fallen asleep somewhere during the night, Brother Zacariah was pacing slowly in the room.

-How can you be so sure about Akec and what he did?-

Brother Zacariah seemed to ignore the question, he did not turn to face Jace, the boy was almost sure the Silent Brother would stay silent when his voice echoed in Jace's head.

"Because I did a similar choice, many years ago."

Jace sighed and got up the bed where he was lying awake, surprised.

-Did you ever regret your choice?-

"There was nothing to regret, to die means to leave the people you love behind, the price of living is looking them go away."

-I guess I should be happy he has Magnus, shouldn't I?-

The Silent Brother did not speak again, but Jace knew better.

He scrumbled off the bed and reached the door in a few steps.

-I need to go.- He said and went out.

He was reaching the door when he saw Maryse standing before him with her arms crossed on her chest.  
-Where are you going?- She asked coldly.

-Nowhere.-

She sighed tiredly.

-Where is Brother Zacariah?-

-In the Infirmary.-

-Go fetch him, I will be waiting for everyone in the Library.- She was turning when she noticed the blood on Jace's shirt.

Every inch of severity left her body and her face suddenly looked just tired, she motioned toward the stain.

-What happened to you?- She asked and Jace saw the fear in her eyes.

-No... nothing.- He stuttered. Maryse moved toward him and moved his shirt away looking straight at the parabatai rune, now as red as fresh blood.

-Alec!- She cried putting her hands on her mouth.

-No, it's not like that, he is all right!- Jace tried to calm her down but Maryse kept staring at the rune on his chest.

"Maryse." Brother Zacariah's voice came strong in their head. "Don't mourn your son because he is still among the living."

-My little Alec, how is that possible?-

"Jace call Alexander and Magnus ask them to come here." The Silent Brother instructed and Jace could just nod and call Magnus' phone.

When Isabelle woke up she needed a few moments to realize were she was, suddenly everything that had happened came rushing at her but she refused to cry again.

A light knock on her door made her jump.

-Come on!- She called and felt like smiling when she saw her brother's messy hair. She realized soon enough that he was worried.

-Iz, we have to go to the Institute.- He said, his big blue eyes confident despite the concern.

-What, why?-

-Mom saw Jace's rune and almost freaked out, I need you to be ready in ten.- And he went out.

The first thing Isabelle saw when she reached the living room was Magnus sitting on the couch, both his arms wrapped around Alec's body as the boy sat between the Warlock's legs. Alec was caressing Magnus'cheek and they were smile at each other. Alec seemed so happy, she did not want to interrupt the moment, but they saw her.

-Good morning Isabelle.- Magnus greated her.

-We should go.- Alec whispered without any track of the previous smile.

The other nodded silently and Isabelle realized that Magnus looked tired as if everything that had happened in the last two days had hurt him more than anything in his whole life as long as it was.

Alec and Magnus kept their fingers entwined as they got up the sofa and moved to the door.

The moment they were outside in the street Alec realized that was the first time he went out after what had happened, noises and colors around him seemed so much more than he remembered, everything seemed to hurt his ears or his eyes and he stopped midway two fingers on his forehead.

-Sweetheart, are you ok?- Magnus immediately asked leaned towards him.

-What's wrong with him?- Isabelle came right after them.

-Don't speak about me as I'm not here, Iz.- Alec said slowly looking up at the concerned face of his boyfriend. -I'm all right Magnus, it's just my senses seem to be better than before.- He smiled.

-I will portal us to the Institute from here.- The Warlock said. He leaned down kissing Alec's lips lightly and then started to work at the portal.

Isabelle put an hand on his brother's arm.

-You shouldn't always worry about everyone.- She whispered.

-It's what big brothers do.- He smirked at her.

Magnus called them back, the portal was ready.

Everyone in the library was silent, Jace was staring at the flames in the big fireplace, Clary was next to him, Brother Zacariah seemed interested in something outside the window and Maryse had her head in her hands she was looking blankly at the floor.

She had lost Max, the idea of losing Alec was just unbearable. Brother Zacariah had explained her something about her son becoming something different phisically while he was still the same person he was before, but she couldn't deny she was scared.

"They are here." Brother Zacariah told them.

When Alec had to put his hand on the wooden doors of the Institute, he was sure they would not open, what he was not sure was the way he could react at the clear evidence of him not being a Shadowhunter anymore. He closed his eyes for just a second and thought about Magnus and his family, how they would have felt if he had died, and he remembered his vow, he had made his choice he would never regret it.

With that he bite his wrist feeling the skin give away under his sharp fangs and the blood on his tongue.

"They told me I am a Shadowhunter no more, but I am a Nephilim nonetheless, I have never denied my blood not even when I asked for this time. I will fight with my people until my body will be strong enough, please let me in so I can help them once again."

He prayed in his mind and touched the door, it took a second and the door slowly opened before their eyes.

Isabelle gasped and Magnus brought their joined hands at his lips and kissed Alec's fingers as his boyfriend smiled at him.

-We need to go.- Alec said. Isabelle looked relieved and the three moved inside.

When they entered the library Maryse almost jumped from the armchair her eyes wide on her face as she took in her son's appearance clearly looking for something different, but she could not find anything, he was still her baby boy. Her gaze met his for a second and she showed her relief just for a moment before masking her emotions once again.


End file.
